Tuesday, November 30, 2010

A Little More Holiday Cheer

You know what I just did? I just turned on the Christmas lights. They seemed like the perfect antidote to the dark (very hard to shoot in) light.

I made myself a cup of hot tea. It's warming up my fingers. But of course, is not anywhere near the computer keyboard. Promise.

I traded my outside hat for my Santa hat. Because it keeps me warm. And it makes me smile. Because it's sparkly and Santa-y, and also, it allows me to wear a T-shirt, which is always good. (I don't "do" long sleeved shirts.)

But no Christmas music. Oh, no. Baby steps. Nickelback is the perfect fit for the snow, cold, darkness, Christmas lights, (far away) tea , and Santa hat.

Monday, November 29, 2010


I wanted to write a Thanksgiving post. I really did. There were all sorts of drafts running through my head, from serious and heartfelt to sarcastic. (Although I am glad that our President knows the difference between North and South Korea.)

But I just felt like anything I said would diminish it. I couldn't find the words to capture my feelings of love, being loved, well-being, gratitude. (Besides, I thought I said it pretty well here.)

So let me say this.

I am thankful that I have so much to be thankful for. That I can't begin to list it all. That I feel so lucky that I can't put it into words.

Happy (belated) Thanksgiving.

Sunday, November 28, 2010

Weekly Winners: Winter

It's winter. I miss the sun and its shadows. But I've also been having fun playing with different light. And I've become obsessed with bare branches against the sky.

Crossed wires

Street signs

A couple that spends all their time together

Shriveled color


A shot of brightness

Corners of a gate

One road diverges


Reflections of Christmas

Ice in the sun

Wednesday, November 24, 2010


A stunningly blue sky.
White cotton balls of clouds scuttle across the open expanse.
Sun illuminates the world.
It has no origin;
Existing only to reveal and frighten away the darkness.

The breeze that was only moments ago caressing my face so gently,
Blows hair in my eyes.
I blink.
Leaves shudder, fighting to keep their tenuous hold.

Those that lost their delicate grip swirl around me.
The breeze has been overtaken by a stronger friend.
Its friend is not my friend.

Whipping the clouds out of their cotton ball shapes,
Forming them into dark masses across the horizon.
The world is no longer illuminated.
Shadows appear in place of sunlight.

The wind’s power frightens me,
Bringing dusk into daylight.
Its ability to transform a world,
The way the branches bend and sway at its touch.

I am forced to retreat.
The wind buffeting me,
Telling me I am not welcome here.
The leaves do not say goodbye,
Preoccupied with their struggle of opposing the wind’s force.

I see more leaves lose the fight,
Bend to the authority of the building storm.
A storm that has taken the world by surprise.

Wide open blue has morphed into a threatening ebon monster.
The sun is blotted out,
The trees are overpowered.

I resent its authority.
Yet I cannot question it.
I can wait.
Wait to see the next day.
To examine the wreckage.

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Random Tuesday Thoughts

How can you tell something is different if you don't remember how it was before?

Word scares me when it asks if I want to save the changes when I haven't made any changes. I always think it's going to delete everything, and then maybe wipe the hard drive for good measure.

Harry Potter rocks.

You know it's bad when you'd rather go to the dentist.

My school put on a play entitled The Bloody Attack of the Evil, Demonic Giraffe Puppet. I wish I could have seen it.

Is there an actual technique for folding fitted sheets? My technique is to smoosh them as small as they can get, shove them in the back of the closet, and hope no socks or other small articles of clothing got stuck.

I am very thankful Thanksgiving is this week. The food and the giving thanks will be great, but right now, I am just thankful for a long weekend.

Sunday, November 21, 2010

Weekly Winners


Looking in

Down the path

Sun and shadows

Red and pointy

Climbing up my wall

Chillin' in the sun

Fruit fruit fruit fruit

Friday, November 19, 2010

The Cold and the Christmas Carols

I wish there was a way to capture the smell of woodsmoke. It is the one thing that really makes it feel like winter to me. I can picture people curled up safely in their houses, reading a good book, with something warm simmering on the stove.

It only works its magic when I'm outside in the cold. It makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside.

I need to get better at taking gloves outside with me. I haven't quite gotten it in my head that it's cold. Despite the woodsmoke smells. Normally it isn't a big deal, but when I'm outside with my camera, my hands get cold very rapidly.

I am too eager to be taking pictures than to worry about the temperature of my hands. By the time I notice that my fingers are having trouble with the tiny little camera buttons, I'm too involved to care.

It is starting to feel like winter to me. And I like that. In general, I like winter. There is something so different about having to get bundled up before you dare poke your nose outside. Then being able to come in and drink hot chocolate with just the right amount of marshmallows.

I don't like Christmas being shoved down my throat at every turn. It's on the radio, (one station has started playing nothing but Christmas music), it's at the stores, it's in the catalogs. I love Christmas. I love having no school for two whole weeks, not having any agendas, decorating the tree, wrapping gifts, getting gifts, all that stuff.

I don't associate retail shopping or money with Christmas. Or really any holiday for that matter. I feel like it takes away the spirit. The spirit of caring and thought that can be put into a gift. I miss Thanksgiving being given it's own special time. It's as though it is completely worthless to stores because they can't make money off it. No decorations or toys your child must have. 

I don't really know....I'm trying to ignore it. To breathe in the woodsmoke and laugh at myself as I forget my gloves yet again. To enjoy seeing Smokey curl up on top of the heater. To revel in wearing hats and scarves. I'll focus on that.

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Random Tuesday Thoughts


Isn't it annoying when inappropriate things pop into your head? Not inappropriate in general, just bad timing. Like when your tutor is explaining inclined planes and it occurs to you that fried chicken is fricken.

Another one of my fish died. It somehow managed to squeeze itself through a tiny little hole into the air pump and got trapped. The weird thing is, every time I replace the filter, I check and double check that no fish are caught because I'm so paranoid I might kill one that way. I don't know if it's good knowing it wasn't my fault, or bad knowing that they can swim in there anytime and die.

I've come to the conclusion that I like the idea of short hair, but not so much the reality. I just think I look better with longer hair. I do enjoy having less hair to deal with, although it is very obvious when I haven't taken a shower for a few days. (ahem)

I really wish there was a way to delete music directly off my iPod.

It creeps me out when deer stare at me while I'm getting dressed.

I packaged up my first Christmas gift yesterday. It was weird pulling out all the green and red paper.

I am so excited, for Harry Potter. We're going on Sunday, two days after it opens. Very excited.

Sunday, November 14, 2010

Friday, November 12, 2010

Prickly Porcupine Face

It's been a tough week. Headache, tired, achy, all that jazz.

Last night Smokey decided it was play time as I was trying to get in bed. And then that it would be appropriate to meow loudly when I ignored her.

This morning my mom said I was being prickly. I was wearing my porcupine face. I didn't know I had a porcupine face. I'm working very hard to put that face away and bring out my-well, a nicer, less prickly face.

I'll let you know how that goes.

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

An Overdue Thank You

Dear Legs,

I want to say thank you.

For all you do.

You keep me standing.

You carry me forward.

You are a part of my whole.

I don't know why you hurt.

I can't fix it.

I can't change it, or help it.

But I can appreciate you more.

All the work you do for me.

Especially when I'm not aware that you're working.

I can work to say nicer things about you.

Although not verbalized, they are hurtful.

And many times not true.

I can work to appreciate your awesome imperfection.

So thank you.

Love, Me

Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Random Tuesday Thoughts


It's November, so naturally, Christmas decorations are out in full force.

My mom and I had a water fight yesterday. In the kitchen. It was lots of fun. (She started it.)

Why are all mental pictures bad ones?

There are still several non-dairy products in the fridge from a couple weeks ago when I tried going dairy free. I think they're going to end up in the trash. Some things were actually palatable, but we ate all those.

I'm learning all these weird things about myself that I thought were perfectly normal until someone told me otherwise.

My favorite book as a kid was The Balloon Tree. Whenever I think about it, I hear my mom's voice reading it. I can't separate one from the other.

That's a good thing.

Monday, November 8, 2010

Weekly Winners: Around the Block

Here I am, just a day late. These shots were all taken around our house and neighborhood. It's fun seeing the little pieces that I don't usually notice.

Monday, November 1, 2010


Last night we had two trick-or-treaters. One young girl (very polite-she wouldn't take more than two pieces of candy) dressed up as a frog of some sort. A teenage boy "dressed up" as a Packer. His costume was a Packers hoodie. His friend, who had come a "Blackhawk", refused candy.

We have a lot of candy left.

I "dressed up" as a witch to hand out candy; I wore a pointy black hat.

On a completely unrelated note, I finished a painting about a week ago:

I am so ready to be done hearing election ads, but I am not ready for the projected results.

Oh, and watch this: