Showing posts with label poetry. Show all posts
Showing posts with label poetry. Show all posts

Saturday, March 17, 2012

Laughing

The woman’s laugh
reverberates in the small space.
The space is too small,
too small for her
loud fake laugh.
The laugh that never reaches her eyes.
The laugh that dampens the mood of her visitors.
They shrink smaller and smaller.
The plastic chairs do not offer cover,
No protection from this woman
and her laugh.
This woman they used to know.
The woman who laughs to hide the pain.
The woman who won’t tell them what they already know.
The woman who is killing herself
But hides it with a laugh.

Tuesday, January 3, 2012

Strength

Time stretches.I stare anywhere but at his face,
his wide, pleading eyes.
I know that if I see his face,
the contours I know so well,
that I will waver.
He will see me waver.
Eyes dramatically filling with tears,
he will ask for forgiveness.
His tone so self-deprecating,
I will forgive him.
But only,
I tell myself,
because it's all his fault.
And this way, I relieve him of the guilt.
We both know I'm the strong one.
Strong I may be, but he knows how to tear through.
Right through to my soft, wounded spots.
It's our routine.
Our pattern.
Our relationship.
This time, I tell myself, will be different.
Is different.
Confident in my decision,
a decision that puts me first,
I bring my eyes to meet his.
As his eyes well up,
I whisper,
"It's okay."

Thursday, September 1, 2011

Slow Dance

I didn't write this. I received this from a forwarded email, and I think it's beautiful, and a good reminder.
 
SLOW DANCE

Have you ever
watched kids

On a merry-go-round?

Or listened to
the rain

Slapping on the ground?

Ever followed a
butterfly's erratic flight?

Or gazed at the sun into the fading
night?

You better slow down.

Don't dance so
fast.

Time is short.

The music won't
last.

Do you run through each day

On the
fly?

When you ask How are you?

Do you hear the
reply?

When the day is done

Do you lie in your
bed

With the next hundred chores

Running through
your head?

You'd better slow down

Don't dance so
fast.

Time is short.

The music won't
last.

Ever told your child,

We'll do it
tomorrow?

And in your haste,

Not see
his

sorrow?

Ever lost touch,

Let a good
friendship die

Cause you never had time

To call
and say,'Hi'

You'd better slow down.

Don't dance
so fast.

Time is short.

The music won't
last.

When you run so fast to get somewhere

You
miss half the fun of getting there.

When you worry and hurry
through your day,

It is like an unopened
gift....

Thrown away.

Life is not a
race.

Do take it slower

Hear the
music

Before the song is over.

Monday, May 30, 2011

Outside the Lines

The black outline guides my hand.
Silent as I scribble over it,
marring the neat black ink.

Inked in so carefully by an unknown hand.
A hand that decides what is correct.
What is right.
Dictating my picture's outcome.

An invisible hand should not be given so much power.
But it's just a drawing.
How much power can a child's scribble possess?

The shaky marks,
colors swirled,
patternless.

Light, a touch that is barely there.
Or hard. Rupturing the paper's smooth surface.

It is like spilled milk.
Anything can be seen in the lines.
Between the lines, anything can have meaning.
Anything can have power.

I flip the page over to start anew.
Determined that this time, I will get it right.
A new outlined shape lies before me.

Containing within it bunnies, ranbows, flowers.
Age-appropriate, fun things to color.
Meaningless.

I stare down at the crayon I have clutched in my hand.
My adult-sized fist dwarfs the small stub.
Worn down from years of coloring.

I am convinced it is worn from being used to color outside the lines.
I was lawless in my youth.

My hand moves over the paper.
I strike out the plain black lines.
My lines form shapes,
free from the invisible hand.

Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Light

It comes and goes.
The difference between a blurry view
and a clear one.
Allowing me to see.
A pinprick in the distance gives me hope.
Its absence can be frightening.
Unable to see.
Unable to move.
Unable to tell if I am still here.
A sudden burst illuminates the world.
Harshly, lacking shadows.
It cannot lie.
Unmasking what was hidden beneath
the darkness.

Monday, February 21, 2011

Waiting

The woman’s toes tap anxiously on the floor,
Waiting.
She is powerless.
Sitting in a chair that jabs into her back.
The buzzing fluorescent lights tensing already tight muscles.
A muted TV flashes in the corner.
Even through her closed eyelids, the harsh light prevents relaxation.

Her fingers begin to tap in time with her impatient toes.
She notices her chipped nail polish.
Begins to pick at it,
Creating a small storm of black flakes.
They fly off,
Faster and faster.
She has to remove it all,
She must get down to the bare nail.

Her head jerks up,
Fearful of being caught.
Terrified of being seen so vulnerable.
Terrified, but her anxiety insists she continue to pick at the stubborn polish.

The woman shifts in her chair, uncomfortable.
She discovers a marginally more comfortable position.

She shifts again,
Convinced there must be a better way to situate herself.
Slouches down,
Ramrod straight spine.
Feet flat on the floor,
Tucked underneath her.
She stops.
Pauses.
Is anyone staring?
Is her discomfort attracting attention?
Settling into the most neutral position she can find,
She resolves to not shift again.

The polish is close to gone.

She checks the area.
Just the man with the army haircut behind the desk.
He has been scribbling in charts for over twenty minutes.
Wait, is that a white coat behind the doors?

Doors that swallowed the bustle,
The chaos, the commotion.
The rushed voices.
Running shoes, squeaking on the fake tile floor.
The large bed,
The bed that almost enveloped his fragile body.
He fit too well.

His body too accustomed.
The white sheets,
Freshly laundered.
Remotes and wires surrounding his head.

A head with hair, so curly and unruly.
The black ringlets a stark contrast against the sheets.
Beautiful hair that casts a dark shadow over his face.
A face she has burned into her memory.

The eyes,
So penetrating.
Ears sticking out at odd angles.
Eyebrows, flat and serious.
A nose centered perfectly above a crooked mouth.
A mouth that enables him to smile.
A smile that can crack her heart in two.

Her toes speed up.
Her brain doesn’t obey orders.
She doesn’t want to consider that possibility.
It’s not a possibility.
The doors,
The doors that wrenched him out of her outstretched arms,
The doors swing open.
They smack into the wall,
Yet are noiseless.
She flinches, sensing the impact.

At tall figure.
A figure in a white coat.
He walks with authority.
Silently, he approaches.
Emotionless,
He gives nothing away.

He strides purposefully to her chair.
She tries to disappear into it.
Hiding behind its faded cover,
Letting its sharp edges dig into her body.
His coat collapses around his legs as they bend.
He kneels, ignoring identical rows of chairs ranged around the room

She is fixated by his mouth:
He holds it in a perfectly straight line.
It is a mouth that has delivered the lines she is about to hear an immeasurable number of times.

Her breath catches.
Eyebrows raised in shock.
Words and sentences blend into ambient noise.
Shaking hands move to cover an open mouth,
A gaping hole of surprise.

Wednesday, January 5, 2011

Breaking Shadows

Bright fluorescence breaks the natural stillness
She makes her way, through the unnatural light,
Through the lit maze.
Her gaze rests on familiar objects,
Distorted by the fake light.
She looks out the window,
Hoping to see a white crescent,
But everything is obscured.
Staring into the darkness,
She can’t quite transport herself away.
She knows it must end.
She must find the switch.
Searching.
Searching. 
No longer there. 
She looks around.
The furniture has moved.
Her world is changing around her,
Losing control, she starts to
run. 

Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Storm

A stunningly blue sky.
White cotton balls of clouds scuttle across the open expanse.
Sun illuminates the world.
It has no origin;
Existing only to reveal and frighten away the darkness.

The breeze that was only moments ago caressing my face so gently,
Blows hair in my eyes.
I blink.
Leaves shudder, fighting to keep their tenuous hold.

Those that lost their delicate grip swirl around me.
The breeze has been overtaken by a stronger friend.
Its friend is not my friend.

Whipping the clouds out of their cotton ball shapes,
Forming them into dark masses across the horizon.
The world is no longer illuminated.
Shadows appear in place of sunlight.

The wind’s power frightens me,
Bringing dusk into daylight.
Its ability to transform a world,
The way the branches bend and sway at its touch.

I am forced to retreat.
The wind buffeting me,
Telling me I am not welcome here.
The leaves do not say goodbye,
Preoccupied with their struggle of opposing the wind’s force.

I see more leaves lose the fight,
Bend to the authority of the building storm.
A storm that has taken the world by surprise.

Wide open blue has morphed into a threatening ebon monster.
The sun is blotted out,
The trees are overpowered.

I resent its authority.
Yet I cannot question it.
I can wait.
Wait to see the next day.
To examine the wreckage.